Thursday, November 17, 2011

Not the Answer I Was Looking for, but an Answer to Our Prayers

As you all know we have struggled with infertility. It's not an easy thing, but we did recently have a blessing in disguise. A "big" disguise. The month we went into the fertility specialist for the first time I happened to get two large cysts on my ovaries.This caused all progress to halt. I was put on close watch having to go into the doctors for an ultra sound regularly to watch the progress. The main concern is that if the cysts caused my ovaries to twist it would cut off blood flow, put me into emergency surgery, and I could possibly lose my right ovary. The cyst on my right was 11cm and the left was about 9cm. These aren't your average size problem cysts either. These were so massive even the doctor was worried for me. I was concerned too and also devastated to find out that instead of taking steps forward in our fertility treatment we had to take a few steps back and worry more about my safety and well being. For now I was "kind of" on bed rest without lying in bed. Meaning: I couldn't lift heavy objects, or work out, or anything else(if you know what i mean).
Luckily I have such a sweet husband and Dad who gave me a blessing that night when I found out. I was super worried because I just quit my job and was starting a new one, and if by chance I would have to get surgery, I would not be able to work with my new job at jet Blue, because training requires 100% attendance no exceptions. However, I was blessed to be able to make it to training. My cysts made a lot of progress in the first month however the progress halted in the second. I was so worried that I would never get them to go away. So we played the waiting game in a different way, and here is where the true answer to my prayers came. The answer wasn't getting rid of my cysts right away as I would have liked it, we didn't get pregnant, and in the second month we didn't make progress. Doesn't sound like much right?.. Wrong!! The best blessing of all,and answer to our prayers was that I no longer stressed each month whether we would get pregnant or not. I could finally!! Finally! relax! Because I felt there was no chance in getting pregnant I didn't even worry or think about it. So now I would like to thank my Heavenly Father for helping me forget and not worry. I also want to thank him because yesterday we went to the doctors and my cysts are now gone! Everything was normal and we can start our journey again on figuring out what is wrong and how to fix it.
I am so thankful for this blessing in disguise. I am so truly blessed and I know the Lord loves us and blesses us in ways that we may not understand, but ways that are best for us!

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Our Forever Family

Our Forever Family